h1Galentine’s Day has become a thing – why hasn’t Malentine’s Day?/h1pPerhaps you are someone who does not like texting. As far as your friends go, over a time, they have become used to your communication style. They understand that you are not a big ‘texter’. Therefore, when it takes you ages to answer a text, or the fact that you never actively text them, they do not misinterpret the meaning. Unfortunately, we don’t have this same luxury with people we have just met. And, because texting takes the least amount of effort, and is the least personal medium of communication, it seems to function as expected kind of contact when you’re first getting to know someone; regardless of other person’s preferred communication style. I have noticed a trend amongst my female clients to be fed up with the endless text chats.a href=”https://topadultreview.com/imlive-review/”imlive granny/a One woman explained she was tired of investing so much time in the wrong guys. I revealed that she had only been on one date with the particular guy she was referring to. ‘Was one evening, really so much time wasted?’ I asked.  She replied, ‘Oh no, but there was clearly the constant texting! We did that for hours.’ She decided that she failed to want to waste he valuable time texting with someone whom she failed to know well. We decided that her new protocol is to explain, when first starting to make the journey to know someone, that she was not a ‘texter’, and only texted for practical purposes, like meeting times and places./pp Of course, she would also have to follow through using this, as actions speak louder than words, and she could end up in the exact situation again. Another client had the opposite problem. Her lack of texting was perceived as lack of interest. She had been on a date with, Jim, a really nice guy whom she was excited to see again. While he was away on business, she had lunch with, Jane, the friend who had introduced the two at her party. Jane relayed the message that Jim really liked my client, but he didn’t feel like she liked him, as she never sent him any texts. Obviously my client was dumbfounded (and quite lucky to have received this insider tip!) Her dislike of texting could have cost her a potentially lovely relationship. So what should she do? Force herself to text?/pp Well, if she knows it’s important to the other person, being a bit more proactive would be nice. As we know, once you are in a relationship, you spend a lot of time doing things for your partner that you wouldn’t normally do, because you know it is important to him or her. But, I would also recommend having a honest conversation. Saying something light, like ‘You might have noticed chances are that I am not a great fan of texting. It’s just not something that is on my radar. Nonetheless, I am really enjoying getting to know you, and I think you’ll find I’m far better at communicating by (phone/email).’ In this manner the other person doesn’t get the wrong idea about your feelings, they change their expectations about your texting, and they know the best way to communicate with you: win, win, win! Let’s face it, whether you love it or hate it, texting will be with us for a while. Hopefully you’ll enjoy the next wave of communication that technology brings us more./pp In the meantime, if you don’t enjoy it, just tell the person upfront. Happy texting! ( Or not). Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook0Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating Relationships Tagged in: communication, Dating, flirting, flirtology, iphone, jean smith, phones, text, texting I have been single and dating for almost three years. I have certainly seen it all, heard it all and been through it all at this point. Unfortunately, 85% of my experiences have been……not so wonderful. I have grown used to the flaky, emotionally unavailable, psycho, and [email protected]*k boy types of men, who seem to be lurking around every corner. My circle of amazing and stunning friends, all have had similar experiences as single women, also. So, close to two months ago, I decided to just remove myself from the dating pool and breath some [email protected]*k boy free, fresh air. Given the history of my single life, I’ve developed almost a radar that enables me to more easily detect the type of men we all want to avoid. The phrase “red flag” is widespread terminology for that warning signal your gut instinct provides you with when a man’s behaviors aren’t on the up or over./pp I’d been having an accurate run of spotting the warning signs and being able to disengage before any damage had been done.a href=”https://topadultreview.com/”https://topadultreview.com//a With what I’ve been through, I was thankful to finally be able to hear and heed the distress signals.h29 Reasons There May Not Be A Second Date/h2 But not so fast……. all of a sudden, you’ve met a good guy, unexpectedly. Everything seems to be going right, he seems genuine, no red flags where there usually is, no internal instincts telling you to flee. Nonetheless, you’re so accustomed to the typical warning signs, maybe you’ve overlooked something because you actually really like him? Paranoia sets in. You start to question things in your mind, maybe he’s actually an extremely charming sociopath? Perhaps he’s crafting stories about his background and his whereabouts. You have no vital proof, but the suspicions keep creeping up in your [email protected]*k boy tainted brain. You realize you have now acquired the unfortunate side effect of dealing with waste-men; self-sabotage. Naturally, it’s smart to be aware and protect yourself and your heart, but don’t let the bad behaviors of other men leave you jaded, creating grandiose delusions of an honest, good man, having had a heinous criminal background or a harem of other women at his disposal. Don’t ruin what has the potential to be something amazing, by displaying psycho chic tendencies./pp Say goodbye to the haunting memories of boys past. Remember to trust your gut instinct when it’s telling you that you’re in the presence of a real man, just as you would when it’s telling you to run from a bad one. Never let the heart that didn’t love you, keep you from the one that will. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook0Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating Relationships Tagged in: #redflags #dating #relationships #onlinedating #men #love Goddammit, Viceroy, that’s NOT the hokey-pokey dude. Well, maybe it’s easy for some people, but some of us could use some guidance – and on occasion even insider industry knowledge – with regards to dating on the internet.  Cue Online Dating Bootcamp, created by world-renowned dating expert JULIE SPIRA.   Julie is offering a rare chance for all you online dating enthusiasts in Las Vegas: ten lucky singles will be given one month of free personal coaching, admittance to the iDate Dating Industry Super Conference at Harrah’s, and $100 cash for sharing their experiences with online dating sites and mobile dating apps. The conference takes place between January 16 – 19, 2013.  To be eligible to apply, you really must be single (duh) and between 21 – 40 years old. You must also be willing to sharing your bio/dating profiles with the Bootcamp, as well as speak, write and/or provide video testimonials about all your experiences.  If selected, you’ll need to be available for a 90 minute panel at the conference on January 17th.  You’ll also be assigned to two online dating sites to use during your month of coaching with Julie. Singles, this is your chance to learn the in-depth strategies and practices of the online dating world, as well as to mingle with top execs from the industry! For more information visit: OnlineDatingBootCamp.com Contact email to apply: [email protected] Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox!/pp Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook5Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Advert One of the main things I hear from women on the dating front is, “Where are all the men?!?”  Women today want to know why men have become wishy washy little capricious flimsy globs of indecisiveness. Ouch. The problem is not that men are intentionally indecisive; it’s that they are clueless about what they are doing. Most guys defer the decisions to their lady, because they believe that is what their woman want. They think it makes her feel empowered. They think it shows they are equal in their partnership. Their sole underlying aim is in order to make her happy. Sadly, nonetheless, this tactic hurts both parties in the relationship./pp When a woman wants a man, she wants a rock, a solid and strong man to function as center of her hurricane. Not a “wussifried” subservient little toady. One quick solution to quash this problem is actually quite simple… MAKE A DECISION! That’s it. Easy, right? How many times have you had that moment as soon as your lady asks,”So what would you like to do tonight?” And you, thinking you are being open and deferential, say, “Oh, I don’t know, what would YOU like to do?” Then you two bounce this responsibility football back and forth till she’s ready to punch you in the sack and scream, “Make a decisioooon!” Here’s how you avoid that ping-pong fiasco: Never repeat the question. That puts all the onus on her. Instead, you man up, make a decision, and offer it to her. You can even offer multiple options, but make a decision. It gives her something to work with. She actually is looking for you to function as man that can make decisions, be a leader, and take a course of action. Then she can decide for herself if you are the kind of man she desires to follow or not. Now it really is her choice. If you relinquish your own power of choice to her, you emasculate yourself and force all the responsibility on her.h2How to truly have a V-Day Threeway – The Guide Singles Everywhere Have Been Waiting For!/h2 She has enough crap to worry about in her own life, and making up your mind is not on her to-do list, trust me. So, when she asks, “What do tonight?” You say something like, “I heard about this great BBQ place./pp I’ve been wanting to check it out. Let’s go have some BBQ tonight.” She’ll reply, “Oh that sounds good, honey…” Now, wait for it…2, 3, 4… “But ya knoooow, I read about this great little sushi place that just opened up. I’ve really been wanting to try it.” And here, gentlemen is where you either Rock and Roll, or Dive!, Dive!, Dive!… If you hold fast, thinking you are being strong, declaring, “No! I said BBQ, and I meant BBQ!” – you will be spending an extremely lonely night covered in BBQ sauce and tears. But, if you valiantly man up and say, “Hmm, sushi, you say? Well, I heard about that place too, and you know, that actually sounds pretty good, Sweetie. We can try BBQ another time. Let’s go get our sushi on!” – you may more than likely be a recipient of some sake-fueled, Samurai style lovin’ from a woman who knows she has herself a real man. So get out there, and make those decisions, fellas!/pp And don’t worry, she’ll let you know if you’re wrong. Spike Spencer, The Dating Sage Go on, be strong. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook23Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Relationships Tagged in: advice for dating, dating fail, dating for life, dating sage, dkyd, relationship tips, spike spencer During the dark days of the great recession, the typical household was too consumed with careful financial planning to enjoy themselves too energetically. This encouraged many to change the pace of their lifestyle, as they looked to enjoy time at home rather than traveling overseas and investing in hedonistic nights out. While the economy may have rebounded to record significant growth in the final 18 months, nonetheless, the habits established during the recession have remained prominent. As a result of this, staying in has become the new ‘going out’./pp If staying in is the ‘new going out’, nonetheless, how exactly can you create a fun and immersive experience within the comfort of your own home? Create an Environment fit for Entertaining Before you plan your ideal night in, it is important that you create a home that is fit for entertainment. This has a variety of elements, including fixtures, furnishings and multipurpose entertainment centers, and the key is to design a balanced and functional space that welcomes guests. In terms of the interior, the most important thing is always to optimize the space at your disposal as this will enable you to host a larger number of guests without causing congestion or crowding. To achieve this, you should consider investing in multipurpose furniture that can also serve as storage. Gaming chairs provide a excellent example, while the installation of hard floors will prevent long-term damage in high traffic areas. Invest in Cross-platform Entertainment On a similar note, additionally, you will need to purchase multipurpose devices that permit cross-platform entertainment. This can include everything from media streaming to gaming, while the integration of devices such as Chromecast will create a channel through which it is possible to share content across multiple devices. So whether you wish to access a range of popular online casinos enjoy a movie night with friends, you can access libraries through your smart phone or tablets and stream this wirelessly to a large screen television. The main advantage of this is that it creates a flexible entertainment channel, which can gather content from multiple sources and showcase this to a larger group. Be Creative when Laying on Beverages and Food While it stands to reason that you should provide food and drink for your guests, it is important that you adopt a creative approach when doing so. Cocktails are a must at social gatherings, for example, while you can also buy a diverse range of spirits so that guests can experiment and create their very own unique drinks. In terms of food, it is always best to provide a wide array of snacks that guests can eat at their leisure without impacting on the informal nature of the evening. To ensure that there is a popular range of snacks, ask for ideas from your invited guests and take the time to appeal to most of their needs./pp Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook2Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Online Dating Tagged in: Date Ideas “What talk?” You ask.  There’s a lot of talking a couple has to do before they even get to the serious phase a relationship, let alone marriage.  This is something that’s been getting thrown around within the social media circles I run in.  Just how soon is too soon to start talking about potentially “deal breaking” issues?Ordinarily I’d say “there’s no time like the present” to start talking about these things.  Obviously that’s idiotic and is also my trademark, kids.  Anyway, there’s no magic number here like within ten dates you have to know your date’s sexual preferences, by twenty dates you have to know if they want kids and within fifty dates you should have documentation on your nightstand with regards to your lover’s medical history… That’s a nice thought, but, obviously, not very practical. Below is my tried and and true method for getting over those relationship hurdles, known as the “Urban Dater Relationship Maker 3000… beta” I don’t want to know your name, I just want bang! Bang! Bang! “Um, do you have anything that I should know about that requires special prescription ointments?” “Do you like me?” “If I go to your place you’re not likely to kill me, right?” “How’s that personal hygiene routine working out for ya, champ?” “You are going to call me back… Right?” I don’t want anything serious, I like you, but I would like to keep my options open… Ya dig? “Are you seeing other people?” “Do there is a job or do I need to pay for your broke azz all the time?” “Are you really sure you don’t have anything that I should know about that requires special prescription ointments?” “How do we deal with disagreements?” So that you’re saying you’re not cool with me sleeping with other people?  Lame. “What are your religious/political beliefs?” “How committed are we to this relationship; to each other?” “How do we feel about each others’ friends?” “How do we feel about each others’ family?” The “been together long enough that if you screw me over I’m lighting your stuff on fire and telling your mom that you’re a bad lay” stage. “What direction is this relationship headed?” “Should we move in together?” “Is marriage a viable thought for us?” (Honestly, this happens earlier many times, I think.  If people are relationship minded they can tell in early stages, possibly, whether or not their partner is a suitable mate for holy matrimony) “Will our spiritual differences, if we have them, be a big issue?” “Can we deal with each others’ family?” “You’re not likely to hack me up into little pieces, are you?” The topics I mentioned, in general, should be topics which can be addressed well before you consider marrying some one or really even getting seriously involved, as in moving in together, with someone./pp  Yes, I’ve once again simplified, but sometimes I need to in order to state my point.  So don’t be hating on me, people! As I said, there’s no magic time and energy to launch into these topics and chances are you has these topics way out of order. Perhaps you meet some one you’re crazy about and you guys just “click” and no subject is taboo.  More power to you, these conversations flow at the speed of your comfort level. They should anyway, so don’t feel like you have to talk about these things if you’re not ready or comfortable. Sometimes you need to tell your partner to back off; you do not feel like talking about a particular topic.  Be clear in thought, nonetheless, this goes back to the whole communication thing.  Communication is important, in the event you didn’t know. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook1Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating Relationships, Tips Advice Tagged in: communication, relationship advice, the talk Treant Spotting… Get it, get it?/pp Oh eff you! People who know me can rely on the following: 1. I’m a two-bit shit head who’s useful for little more than jokes and small talk; 2. I know computers n’ stuff and can build you a pretty awesome internet site ( like the one you’re looking at right now); 3. I’ll sleep with your mom should the situation make itself available. You see? Complete and utter uselessness in the form of a feeble and pale white male. I guess I could have started by stating: “I saw the ‘Tree of Life,’ by Terrence Malick and I hated the living shit out of it. Just this morning, I think I… ‘got it.’” What is life and what are memories? Not in a literal sense, but what are they to you? To me they’re a collection of images, sounds and, most of all, feelings./pp In my mind I see a collection of these images and feelings when reminded of something that’s long since happened or gone by… Today I had one particularly vivid flashback of when I first met my girlfriend. I remember things we did together, but not in their entirety; just flashes of images and, again, feelings. I quickly raced through our relationship and certain things jumping out at me and before I was shaken back once again to reality. I had a check to deposit. It’s interesting to say the least. Tree of Life pissed me off. I think it was the (spoiler alert!) dinosaurs at the beginning of the movie that just irked me. I haven’t liked dinosaurs since Little Foot, in the Land Before Time./pp Utter shittery that movie was. Moving along… That movie, I know had some greater message or some shit like that because people wouldn’t shut their damn mouths over it and at the urging of my good friends I saw it… I looked on and had no fucking idea what I was watching./p